Insane Ramblings...What's A Girl To Do?

Intention can be a funny word...it brings into thought what you ought to do, what you meant to do, what you meant, or should have meant. I don't have many intentions these days. Nothing is done with a purpose--at least, I'm getting lost in the haze that is the process. Perhaps it's just Monsoon Season and I have too much water on the brain. Or maybe not enough coffee on the brain. In either case, my intentions are still lacking.

What my intentions are and what I actually manifest rarely ever align themselves, but at least I recognize this? Right? That's a step in the correct direction, if there is ever a correct direction...right? I spend too much time thinking in terms of right or wrong, as if everything is really that cut and dry, black and white, Edward and Jacob. Wait...what?

Last week was phenomenal. This week, I'm drowning. I'm questioning everything I do, I think, and say. What kind of life is it to constantly sit in inquiry and mull over the things you did, thought, and said? Yay to thinking in inquiry--and a big fat nay for the mulling of things. I know that we can only become better versions of ourselves if we sit and meditate and ask questions of ourselves--searching for understanding seems to be man's "groove." But to rip yourself to shreds is not apart of said groove.

I feel so far away from home right now and I'm not even talking about "family" home. I'm referring to "me" home. Perhaps I should rephrase that, the border patrol might pick me up for sounding like an immigrant. A few months ago I was soooo gung ho about what I wanted and who I was, and I feel like I've fallen into a tiny ravine. I'm pulling myself out of it, for sure--I can see the bright sunlight, hear the birds cheering me on, but I'm not there just yet.

I've noticed that when I am completely dissatisfied with my life, my living space becomes too cluttered--and last night I did an overhaul. Throwing out things that I neither need nor want and I feel 100 times better. So that's a positive thing. My Yia Yia once saw and episode of Dr. Phil and he said on the program that people who are terrible house keepers have something mentally wrong with them. I vehemently disagreed with her. But now I see where they may have a point. Having a cluttered mind translates to having a cluttered living space. You hold onto things that you don't need, because you're afraid that if you let go, then you'll drop everything that you've been holding onto. You know that you're not in any position to pick up anything else, but these things have grown attached to you, and you to them. So you hold on. Look for a bigger space so that you can put more things in places, but in all actuality, you're enabling yourself to hold on to more and more crap. When you just need to let go. Let go of the hurt, the shame, the guilt. Only when are arms are truly open can we receive the things we really want and need, not what we think we want and need.

I've been creating this curriculum for the JR high kids that asks the question, "Are we over medicating our kids?" And I came across a pretty interesting statistic--our brains do not fully mature until we're thirty. THIRTY! So it's no wonder that I don't have all of my shit completely straightened out yet--I'm just now getting to maturity! ^^ Oh humor, you never fail me.

I've started the "what the hell am I going to do after Korea" talks and I'm still at a loss. I yearn for stability and discipline but I can't seem to get my mind to understand that just because I have discipline doesn't mean that I can't have creativity. I'm working on this concept and it seems really easy to understand but I've had this block against discipline for so long that it brings Pink Floyd's "The Wall" to a whole new level.
The saga continues I suppose.

Who's up for some pictures?



This is a plate my sister can appreciate. ^^



Sandrich anyone?



This is the Starbucks in Insadong--it's the only one I know of that the sign is written in Korean. Holla!



Because we all need a little style...or styl even.



Does this font look familiar? Hello pirated Disney font!!

Sigh. Okay. I feel a little better. I'm seeing Harry Potter after work tonight so it's time to say "expelliarmus" to these crummy feelings.

xox
c

Holy Bloggerton, Batman!

Hoy Hoy Dear Readers,

All three of you... hehehe I keeed I keeed.

You know, I started this blog out with the intention of writing more and more, and lately it just hasn't been the case. In a matter of 4 days, yes, 4 days, I will have been in Korea for 7 months. SEVEN MONTHS! Can you believe it? Where has the time gone? Certainly not to blogging about it...Perhaps I should start again....

Why hello there, Dear Readers!

Much has been going on--most of it in the teaching area, but it has kept me from writing to you all. Apologies and beers all around.

School has kept me pretty busy, but I really enjoy it. I'm fairly certain I will be signing up for another year after my contract ends in January. It's an easy job (relatively, anyway) and I can make some pretty good money to pay off these pesky student loans. In the 7 months I have been here, I have been a play, helped a couple of causes that I believe in, worked out more, tried all sorts of different kinds of foods, experienced life in a different culture, been approved for an American Express card (Hooray! I'm Somebody!!), and I am currently undergoing the dreaded monsoon season. It's sunny right now, but the rain will come later tonight. Then we will have thunderstorms every day until Monday. Hooray? I don't dislike the rain, I just don't like it to rain EVERY day. We all deserve a little sunshine now and then. I'm told that when we get into the thick of Monsoon Season that the rain won't really cool anything off--it's just a hot, wet mess. ugh. There is a reason why I left Florida...hehe At least there aren't any alligators here, right? Right?! ^^

I haven't travelled anywhere as of yet--although many of my co-workers go to Japan, Vietnam, Thailand, and Malaysia for our holidays. I have been venturing in to Seoul and checking out the many different places. I even adopted a cat, which makes it a little harder to go travel for a week. In September we have another holiday (Chuseok--The Korean Thanksgiving) and we get an entire week off...I have decided that I will undergo lasik surgery so that I do not have to be dependent on my glasses and contacts anymore. I'm told that it will take a week to recover so it's a good thing that I will be doing this over the holiday. I do plan on going to places though--Vietnam is first on my list. I would also like to go to Cambodia and Japan, but Vietnam first.

In other news...I will be participating in my FIRST 5 K on July 17th!! Wish me luck! Granted, I will be walking it, so I may not need THAT much luck, but kind wishes are always appreciated. ^^ I live near Seoul National University of Education and they have a track that I can walk on at night. Because It is going to rain tonight, I just may go to the gym instead--but I seriously need to stretch my muscles. My best friend, Kat, and I went to a boot camp workout yesterday morning and BOY am I ever sore. Tuesday was "cardio" day and I nearly had cardio-failure. ^^ My calves, thighs, and obliques are KILLING ME. I still want to keep this momentum going though. I've gone down a pant size already since I've been here but I need to do more. ^^ Korean food is actually pretty heathy stuff so that is always nice. I generally don't eat foreign (i.e. American, Greek, Mexican, etc) food because well, for one thing it is expensive. You have to pay a VAT tax when purchasing meals at restaurants. Another reason I don't really dig the foreign food is that it simply isn't AS good as it is back home. I've adopted my Yia Yia's mantra of "why bother?" ^^ Of course, she would say this when she saw minimal christmas lights up around the neighborhood. :)


Anyway...it's time for some pictures, yeah?







The first is of the latest addition, Dresden Baptwo Shea--My friend Erica brilliantly quipped that I should post this picture around town with the words, "Dresden Disapproves." I love this face.



Picture two depicts some Korean kitty litter-- notice how the homeboy kitties are whipping it out--and checking each other's junk out...classic! "Oh Korea..."



This is a busy street in Myeongdog--a tremendous shopping area in Seoul.



This was taken around Buddha's birthday celebration. All of Seoul was covered with paper lanterns. It happened to rain on his birthday so many of the celebrations were cancelled.



This is a building that promises "viewtiful views!" heheh Gotta love the Konglish!


Anywho...I hope all is well with you and I will try to post more often.

xox
c

Korean Alleyways...Kalleyways?

Two blogs within 4 days of each other? Who knew I had it in me? I'm just full of surprises.

I had a pretty decent day at work--the last 20 minutes dragged though, so there is always that. My good day could be attributed to my having two grande Americanos at Starbucks this morning/afternoon. Does coffee count as "medicating" yourself? Let's hope so. ^^

I thought that I might show you all some pictures of Korean alleyways...

Alleyways have always fascinated me, especially pictures of them. There is this element of surprise with them...a spirit of unknowing what is lurking there. Perhaps I've spent too much time in Chicago. Anywho...here they are for your viewing pleasure...

Food Glorious Food!

So this weekend marks Memorial Day weekend...and I only remembered this because a friend on Facebook asked, "What are you doing for Memorial Day?"

This is essentially what it is like being an expatriot. You forget things. Things that are supposed to always remember. I nearly missed Mother's Day too--a friend here was telling me what she ordered for her mom. I even got the day wrong--when I placed my order, I made it for the week AFTER Mother's Day. I told my Mom and my sister the mistake I made, and they were fine with getting their gifts a week late. However the fabulous people at Edible Arrangements allowed me to change the delivery date and they got their gifts on the Saturday before Mother's Day.

I am always early on birthdays--mostly because of the time difference but I have been known to wish someone a happy birthday in Korea and have it not even be their birthday. I'm losing my edge, so it seems. ^^

I have been taking quite a few pictures here and a lot of have made it to facebook. I'm going to try to put some on here as well...let's start with food ^^ Why food? Because if there is one thing I have learned from David Sedaris, it is if you can't talk about the celebration of holidays, you talk about food. Bon Appetite!













The first picture is of panchan...panchan is not a particular kind of food--it is the side dishes that comes along with every meal. Consider it to be the bread in a restaurant. You will mostly find the Korean table staple: Kimchi. I have loved Kimchi since I was an angsty teenager. It's a spicy fermented cabbage and it is delicious. ^^

The second picture depicts the wonderful mean called Shabu Shabu. This is also known as hot pot in China. Shabu Shabu is a better though. You start off with a large pot on the table and you make soup. Yes, you go out to dinner to make your own dinner. Bear with me, my story gets better. They aren't asking you to do the dishes. ^^ So you start off with a tray full of veggies, a pot of boiling broth and then you add thinly sliced pork or beef to your soup. There were also some quail eggs in the one we had here. You can keep adding veggies to your broth and when you're done eating the soup, a guy will come by and either make a rice porridge for you or fried rice. Martha Stewart would certainly call this meal, "A good thing."

The third picture is actually a home cooked meal, made by my best friend's mother. I went to Kathryn's parents house for Christmas and this was our Christmas dinner. The pancakes are actually made of squash and they were so amazing! The main dish here is called Daktoritang (Dok-dori-tahng). It's a spicy chicken and potato stew. Del-ish. There was also some fish on the table but I didn't try any of it because I really don't care for fish. There is also some nori on the table---Nori is dried seaweed sheets. ^^

The last two pictures were taken at the same meal. You have probably seen them on my facebook pictures. Kathryn and I went to a noodle house on my second day of being in Korea. My noodle dish had rice cake (looks like the mushroom) in it and I really enjoyed the flavor of the bean paste sauce. The other dish was what Kat had ordered. It had a little squid in there and some clams. I never thought I would even try something like this, but let me be the first to tell you that it was AH-MAY-ZING! Loved it!

I'm going to post more food pictures later, as well as some pictures I have been taking of Korean alleyways, which completely fascinate me.

Allow me to be early again and say Happy Father's Day, Fourth of July, Labor Day, and Halloween. That should do it for now.

Letting the Giant Free

So V-Day is officially done. We had our final meet-up (Cast and Crew Picnic) this weekend and I am all aflutter with mixed emotions. On the one hand, I am so glad to be done with V-Day. It was an amazing experience and I am still in awe that we raised 20 million won for KUMFA. I feel so incredibly blessed to have met some truly amazing and inspiriting people along this journey and now that it is over, we can resume our daily lives--but still take some time to meet up. Aaaand on the other proverbial hand, I am soooooo without a purpose right now. Kat said that usually people get homesick around the 3 month mark and here I am, almost 5 months into my stint in Korea and I am just NOW feeling the effects of said homesickness. I suppose I miss the weather in Chicago (although, I have been hearing nasty words like "SNOW" and "APRIL" and it makes me happy that I am not there). And of course, I miss the people. Jess is graduating and I won't be there to scream for her. I miss my niece and nephews. It's lonely in the future, Dear Readers. I've even entertained the idea of getting an animal to help me cope with the lack of connection that is in my room.
I just need to get out more. I need to get out and see Seoul. Get lost on the subway and take pictures. I enjoy doing that kinda stuff with other people--it's time that I start doing it on my onesy. I also need to get lost in a few good books. I have recently acquired many new books so I will be reading a lot more--this of course, makes me quite giddy. And I also need to sit down and start writing again. I have only written one poem since I've been here. One. Ugh. I need to get motivated. I miss taking my writers group class because I was forced to write each week. Now it's like a holiday--I write when I feel like it. I need to put myself on a strict schedule. I need discipline. I need another cup of coffee...

I've been going through this "what am I supposed to do with my life" phase and when I came across Hunter College's MFA program on my bookmark history--I felt this awakening within myself. This giant is yawning and wants to stretch her limbs--I'm not sure why I nearly had her drawn and quartered. Maybe because I was afraid of her. Afraid of the impact and tremors that I would feel if she fell. Afraid of how tall she would be I allowed her to stand up straight. What would the air be like, way up there? My only answer is to help her up, let her stand and let her be. If she gets taken out with an editorial slingshot, she should get back up and start again.

But I digress.

Teaching. Vaginas. Whiskey. Sox....These things make the world go 'round...

Hello Dear Readers...That should be plural, right? I mean, there are more than just one of you out there? I feel the urge to just hold up a "HI MOM" sign. Sigh.

It's been quite some time since I have posted anything on here--and the last one was about The Moon Bears....oh where to begin?

Since I have been in Korea, I have been teaching, volunteering, grading, drinking, and seeing some pretty amazing things. Pictures you ask? Well...my camera was accidentally left behind in a cab and the cab driver has yet to report that he has it...so no pictures as of yet. I have to get a new camera--but on the bright side, I'm in Asia which is a pretty good place to pick up a nicely discounted one. I'm still researching the one I want--preferably a Sony (just so I can use my other memory cards).

My job is amazing and I love it. I really, really do. The kids are awesome, my bosses are phenomenal--I'm one lucky foreigner. And I have met some truly inspiring people here. Most of them I work with, the others are fabulous people with whom I volunteer. I haven't been able to volunteer with The Bear Truth lately (as I work late on Fridays when they meet) but I have been giving my all to a cause I deeply believe in: VDAY. I am the Volunteer Coordinator of VDAY Seoul 2011 and I'm also in the production itself...the production being The Vagina Monologues. This is an amazing organization that wants to end violence against women and girls. If you haven't educated yourself on VDAY, take a moment and do so. G'head. I'll wait.

So I have been giving so much energy to this cause and it has been so worth it--I'm just so tired now. But we only have 5 more days until this project is over. It's been amazing--it really has, and I'm so ready to do this and have it be over. I know that sounds rather wrong--and I certainly don't mean it the way that it sounds. This year all of our proceeds are going to benefit KUMFA (Korean Unmarried Mothers and Family Association). Being a single mother is tough, but it is wicked tough in Korea. There is a social stigma against single mothers (yet not even a slap on the wrists for the fathers) and most are forced to either have their babies aborted or give them up for adoption. Because of Confucianism, Koreans will not adopt another Korean baby as they view it as "not a blood relation" and therefore, not family. I am so happy to be a part of this year's VDAY organization as well as the performance. I can't wait until it's over but at the same time, I am so happy to be giving my all for this.

As far as the drinking goes...yeah. It's not really THAT often. It's just nice to cut back with friends and enjoy a little whiskey now and then ^^

Which brings me to my next topic...BASEBALL SEASON! And The Sox haven't failed me yet...what other team could cause me to drink during the week. We're off to a slow start, after being swept by the Rangers this week, but I'm still hopeful. After this long of being a Red Sox fan, you kinda have to be.

So that's it for now folks, I will see what I can do about making these posts a bit more regular. Until then, keep your ear to the grindstone.

xox
c

The Bare Minimum Isn't Enough

So one of the causes I have joined while I am in Seoul, South Korea is an organization called The Bear Truth. I had heard a lot about this organization because my friends here are involved in it and I would see their awareness campaigns that exposed the mistreatment of these bears in South Korea. The Moon Bears are held in captivity and are "farmed" for their bile so that they can make medicine from it. Now, I am all for using natural methods of curing illnesses and disease alike, but extracting bile from a bear's gallbladder should not be on the list. After doing some research on this issue, I found this information (from Wikipedia):

To facilitate the bile milking process, the bears are commonly kept in extraction cages, also known as crush cages, that measure around 2.6 feet x 4.4 feet x 6.5 feet (79 cm x 130 cm x 200 cm) for an animal that weighs between 110 to 260 pounds (50 to 120 kg).[2] While this allows for easier access to the abdomen, it also prevents the bears from being able to stand upright, or in some cases move at all. Living for 10–12 years under such circumstances results in severe mental stress and muscle atrophy.[3] In two model Chinese bile farms, the Humane Society of the United States (HSUS) reports that the bears are moved to the crush cages for milking, but the rest of the time live in a cage large enough to stand and turn around.[2]
The World Society for the Protection of Animals sent researchers to 11 bile farms.[2] They reported seeing bears moaning, banging their heads against their cages, and chewing their own paws. The mortality rate is high. Bile bears suffer from a variety of physical problems which include loss of hair, malnutrition, stunted growth, muscle mass loss, and often have their teeth and claws extracted.[4] When the bears stop producing bile after a few years, they are usually killed for their meat, fur, paws and gall bladders. Bear paws are considered a delicacy, and have been seen priced at $250.[2]

So The Bear Truth, amongst other organizations, stand for stopping this process. Wiki even goes on to saying that, "Bear bile is not always needed to make traditional Chinese medicine or other products. Many herbs, such as coptis or rhubarb, can be used as alternatives for bear bile." But like many things, money seems to be a driving force. In order to save the bears, the farmers have to be paid off--and then there are the sanctuaries where the bears would live out their days. In South Korea alone, there are 1,140 bears that are in these bear farms. And the upkeep costs for the bears in these sanctuaries are steep.

Currently, The Bear Truth's mission is to get the Korean Parliament to pass a bill that will make bear farming an illegal practice; but like many causes, they cannot do it alone. For this, they have created a 5 step action plan:

The 5 Action Plan!

*Register on TheBearTruth
*Donate/Buy a bear (Help us fundraise to continue our campaigns)
*Join Our Events
*Spread awareness with friends www.thebeartruth.org.
*Join our cause on Facebook and Twitter page.

The Bear Truth will be hosting another awareness campaign soon in Itaewon. Now, Dear Readers, I know that most of you don't live in South Korea. But the more you know, the more you can tell someone else about it. So do what you can. Buy a bear through the website (it's legit, I promise) and lend your voice to the cause, and the bears. The Bare minimum simply isn't enough.

xox
c